[Book
1]
I
am
like,
They
tell
me,
my
dear
father.
Broader
brows
Howbeit,
upon
a
slenderer
undergrowth
Of
delicate
features,
--
paler,
near
as
grave
;
But
then
my
mother's
smile
breaks
up
the
whole,
And
makes
it
better
sometimes
than
itself.
So,
nine
full
years,
our
days
were
hid
with
God
Among
his
mountains
:
I
was
just
thirteen,
Still
growing
like
the
plants
from
unseen
roots
In
tongue-tied
Springs,
--
and
suddenly
awoke
To
full
life
and
life
's
needs
and
agonies,
With
an
intense,
strong,
struggling
heart
beside
A
stone-dead
father.
Life,
struck
sharp
on
death,
Makes
awful
lightning.
His
last
word
was,
`Love
--'
`Love,
my
child,
love,
love
!'
--
(then
he
had
done
with
grief)
`Love,
my
child.'
Ere
I
answered
he
was
gone,
And
none
was
left
to
love
in
all
the
world.
There,
ended
childhood.
What
succeeded
next
I
recollect
as,
after
fevers,
men
Thread
back
the
passage
of
delirium,
Missing
the
turn
still,
baffled
by
the
door
;
Smooth
endless
days,
notched
here
and
there
with
knives
;
A
weary,
wormy
darkness,
spurr'd
i'
the
flank
With
flame,
that
it
should
eat
and
end
itself
Like
some
tormented
scorpion.
Then
at
last
I
do
remember
clearly,
how
there
came
A
stranger
with
authority,
not
right,
(I
thought
not)
who
commanded,
caught
me
up
From
old
Assunta's
neck
;
how,
with
a
shriek,
She
let
me
go,
--
while
I,
with
ears
too
full
Of
my
father's
silence,
to
shriek
back
a
word,
In
all
a
child's
astonishment
at
grief
Stared
at
the
wharf-edge
where
she
stood
and
moaned,
My
poor
Assunta,
where
she
stood
and
moaned
!
The
white
walls,
the
blue
hills,
my
Italy,
Drawn
backward
from
the
shuddering
steamer-deck,
Like
one
in
anger
drawing
back
her
skirts
Which
supplicants
catch
at.
Then
the
bitter
sea
Inexorably
pushed
between
us
both,
And
sweeping
up
the
ship
with
my
despair
Threw
us
out
as
a
pasture
to
the
stars.
Ten
nights
and
days
we
voyaged
on
the
deep
;
Ten
nights
and
days,
without
the
common
face
Of
any
day
or
night
;
the
moon
and
sun
Cut
off
from
the
green
reconciling
earth,
To
starve
into
a
blind
ferocity
And
glare
unnatural
;
the
very
sky
(Dropping
its
bell-net
down
upon
the
sea
As
if
no
human
heart
should
'scape
alive,)
Bedraggled
with
the
desolating
salt,
Until
it
seemed
no
more
that
holy
heaven
To
which
my
father
went.
All
new
and
strange
The
universe
turned
stranger,
for
a
child.
Then,
land
!
--
then,
England
!
oh,
the
frosty
cliffs
Looked
cold
upon
me.
Could
I
find
a
home
Among
those
mean
red
houses
through
the
fog
?
And
when
I
heard
my
father's
language
first
From
alien
lips
which
had
no
kiss
for
mine
I
wept
aloud,
then
laughed,
then
wept,
then
wept,
And
some
one
near
me
said
the
child
was
mad
Through
much
sea-sickness.
The
train
swept
us
on.
Was
this
my
father's
England
?
the
great
isle
?
The
ground
seemed
cut
up
from
the
fellowship
Of
verdure,
field
from
field,
as
man
from
man
;
The
skies
themselves
looked
low
and
positive,
As
almost
you
could
touch
them
with
a
hand,
And
dared
to
do
it
they
were
so
far
off
From
God's
celestial
crystals
;
all
things
blurred
And
dull
and
vague.
Did
Shakspeare
and
his
mates
Absorb
the
light
here
?
--
not
a
hill
or
stone
With
heart
to
strike
a
radiant
colour
up
Or
active
outline
on
the
indifferent
air.
I
think
I
see
my
father's
sister
stand
Upon
the
hall-step
of
her
country-house
To
give
me
welcome.
She
stood
straight
and
calm,
Her
somewhat
narrow
forehead
braided
tight
As
if
for
taming
accidental
thoughts
From
possible
pulses
;
brown
hair
pricked
with
grey
By
frigid
use
of
life,
(she
was
not
old
Although
my
father's
elder
by
a
year)
A
nose
drawn
sharply
yet
in
delicate
lines
;
A
close
mild
mouth,
a
little
soured
about
The
ends,
through
speaking
unrequited
loves
Or
peradventure
niggardly
half-truths
;
Eyes
of
no
colour,
--
once
they
might
have
smiled,
But
never,
never
have
forgot
themselves
In
smiling
;
cheeks,
in
which
was
yet
a
rose
Of
perished
summers,
like
a
rose
in
a
book,
Kept
more
for
ruth
than
pleasure,
--
if
past
bloom,
Past
fading
also.
She
had
lived,
we'll
say,
A
harmless
life,
she
called
a
virtuous
life,
A
quiet
life,
which
was
not
life
at
all,
(But
that,
she
had
not
lived
enough
to
know)
Between
the
vicar
and
the
country
squires,
The
lord-lieutenant
looking
down
sometimes
From
the
empyrean
to
assure
their
souls
Against
chance-vulgarisms,
and,
in
the
abyss
The
apothecary,
looked
on
once
a
year
To
prove
their
soundness
of
humility.
The
poor-club
exercised
her
Christian
gifts
Of
knitting
stockings,
stitching
petticoats,
Because
we
are
of
one
flesh
after
all
And
need
one
flannel
(with
a
proper
sense
Of
difference
in
the
quality)
--
and
still
The
book-club,
guarded
from
your
modern
trick
Of
shaking
dangerous
questions
from
the
crease,
Preserved
her
intellectual.
She
had
lived
A
sort
of
cage-bird
life,
born
in
a
cage,
Accounting
that
to
leap
from
perch
to
perch
Was
act
and
joy
enough
for
any
bird.
Dear
heaven,
how
silly
are
the
things
that
live
In
thickets,
and
eat
berries
!
I,
alas,
A
wild
bird
scarcely
fledged,
was
brought
to
her
cage,
And
she
was
there
to
meet
me.
Very
kind.
Bring
the
clean
water,
give
out
the
fresh
seed.
She
stood
upon
the
steps
to
welcome
me,
Calm,
in
black
garb.
I
clung
about
her
neck,
--
Young
babes,
who
catch
at
every
shred
of
wool
To
draw
the
new
light
closer,
catch
and
cling
Less
blindly.
In
my
ears,
my
father's
word
Hummed
ignorantly,
as
the
sea
in
shells,
`Love,
love,
my
child.'
She,
black
there
with
my
grief,
Might
feel
my
love
--
she
was
his
sister
once,
I
clung
to
her.
A
moment,
she
seemed
moved,
Kissed
me
with
cold
lips,
suffered
me
to
cling,
And
drew
me
feebly
through
the
hall
into
The
room
she
sate
in.
There,
with
some
strange
spasm
Of
pain
and
passion,
she
wrung
loose
my
hands
Imperiously,
and
held
me
at
arm's
length,
And
with
two
grey-steel
naked-bladed
eyes
Searched
through
my
face,
--
ay,
stabbed
it
through
and
through,
Through
brows
and
cheeks
and
chin,
as
if
to
find
A
wicked
murderer
in
my
innocent
face,
If
not
here,
there
perhaps.
Then,
drawing
breath,
She
struggled
for
her
ordinary
calm
And
missed
it
rather,
--
told
me
not
to
shrink,
As
if
she
had
told
me
not
to
lie
or
swear,
--
`She
loved
my
father,
and
would
love
me
too
As
long
as
I
deserved
it.'
Very
kind.
[Book
5]
AURORA
LEIGH,
be
humble.
Shall
I
hope
To
speak
my
poems
in
mysterious
tune
With
man
and
nature
?
--
with
the
lava-lymph
That
trickles
from
successive
galaxies
Still
drop
by
drop
adown
the
finger
of
God
In
still
new
worlds
?
--
with
summer-days
in
this
?
That
scarce
dare
breathe
they
are
so
beautiful
?--
With
spring's
delicious
trouble
in
the
ground,
Tormented
by
the
quickened
blood
of
roots,
And
softly
pricked
by
golden
crocus-sheaves
In
token
of
the
harvest-time
of
flowers
?--
With
winters
and
with
autumns,
--
and
beyond,
With
the
human
heart's
large
seasons,
when
it
hopes
And
fears,
joys,
grieves,
and
loves
?
--
with
all
that
strain
Of
sexual
passion,
which
devours
the
flesh
In
a
sacrament
of
souls
?
with
mother's
breasts
Which,
round
the
new-made
creatures
hanging
there,
Throb
luminous
and
harmonious
like
pure
spheres
?
--
With
multitudinous
life,
and
finally
With
the
great
escapings
of
ecstatic
souls,
Who,
in
a
rush
of
too
long
prisoned
flame,
Their
radiant
faces
upward,
burn
away
This
dark
of
the
body,
issuing
on
a
world,
Beyond
our
mortal
?
--
can
I
speak
my
verse
Sp
plainly
in
tune
to
these
things
and
the
rest,
That
men
shall
feel
it
catch
them
on
the
quick,
As
having
the
same
warrant
over
them
To
hold
and
move
them
if
they
will
or
no,
Alike
imperious
as
the
primal
rhythm
Of
that
theurgic
nature
?
I
must
fail,
Who
fail
at
the
beginning
to
hold
and
move
One
man,
--
and
he
my
cousin,
and
he
my
friend,
And
he
born
tender,
made
intelligent,
Inclined
to
ponder
the
precipitous
sides
Of
difficult
questions
;
yet,
obtuse
to
me,
Of
me,
incurious
!
likes
me
very
well,
And
wishes
me
a
paradise
of
good,
Good
looks,
good
means,
and
good
digestion,
--
ay,
But
otherwise
evades
me,
puts
me
off
With
kindness,
with
a
tolerant
gentleness,
--
Too
light
a
book
for
a
grave
man's
reading
!
Go,
Aurora
Leigh
:
be
humble.
There
it
is,
We
women
are
too
apt
to
look
to
One,
Which
proves
a
certain
impotence
in
art.
We
strain
our
natures
at
doing
something
great,
Far
less
because
it
's
something
great
to
do,
Than
haply
that
we,
so,
commend
ourselves
As
being
not
small,
and
more
appreciable
To
some
one
friend.
We
must
have
mediators
Betwixt
our
highest
conscience
and
the
judge
;
Some
sweet
saint's
blood
must
quicken
in
our
palms
Or
all
the
life
in
heaven
seems
slow
and
cold
:
Good
only
being
perceived
as
the
end
of
good,
And
God
alone
pleased,
--
that's
too
poor,
we
think,
And
not
enough
for
us
by
any
means.
Ay,
Romney,
I
remember,
told
me
once
We
miss
the
abstract
when
we
comprehend.
We
miss
it
most
when
we
aspire,
--
and
fail.
Yet,
so,
I
will
not.
--
This
vile
woman's
way
Of
trailing
garments,
shall
not
trip
me
up
:
I
'll
have
no
traffic
with
the
personal
thought
In
art's
pure
temple.
Must
I
work
in
vain,
Without
the
approbation
of
a
man
?
It
cannot
be
;
it
shall
not.
Fame
itself,
That
approbation
of
the
general
race,
Presents
a
poor
end,
(though
the
arrow
speed,
Shot
straight
with
vigorous
finger
to
the
white,)
And
the
highest
fame
was
never
reached
except
By
what
was
aimed
above
it.
Art
for
art,
And
good
for
God
Himself,
the
essential
Good
!
We
'll
keep
our
aims
sublime,
our
eyes
erect,
Although
our
woman-hands
should
shake
and
fail
;
And
if
we
fail
..
But
must
we
?
--
Shall
I
fail
?
The
Greeks
said
grandly
in
their
tragic
phrase,
`Let
no
one
be
called
happy
till
his
death.'
To
which
I
add,
--
Let
no
one
till
his
death
Be
called
unhappy.
Measure
not
the
work
Until
the
day
's
out
and
the
labour
done,
Then
bring
your
gauges.
If
the
day's
work
's
scant,
Why,
call
it
scant
;
affect
no
compromise
;
And,
in
that
we
have
nobly
striven
at
least,
Deal
with
us
nobly,
women
though
we
be.
And
honour
us
with
truth
if
not
with
praise.